The Candle and Hypocrisy

Hypocrisy (Hi pok re se') N. False pretense to personal qualities or principles not actually possessed.

I am a hypocrite. I teach about the power of words, how people should not speak ill of others behind their backs and not hurt their feelings when talking to them. I espouse the virtues of using our time well and of having balance in our lives including making time in our busy schedules for the spiritual pursuits of prayer, the study of Torah, and character development.

Yet, I am far from perfect in these areas (and more!).

One might argue then that I shouldn't discuss these concepts but I would like to suggest that a little hypocrisy in each of us is virtuous.

In spiritual matters people usually say, Rabbi "I would love to observe ________ but it is just not the real me." "I need to be true to myself."

Yet in non-spiritual spheres, we are not as honest. At a job interview we don't make the assessment that "the other is more qualified for this position than I am, so don't give it to me".

This is not necessarily wrong. Forin many cases we can grow into the job and do it not only adequately but superbly. In spiritual matters the same might be true, if only we weren't so "honest" with ourselves.

Before Yom Kippur and on a Yartzeitwe light a candle. Why? One reason is that it represents the soul - the part that lives on after the body dies. Just as the flame of the candle always burns upwards, even when turned upside down, so too the soul yearns to be toward heaven,to a relationship with G-d, regardless mistakes made.

The candle reminds us to allow our soul to burn brightly upwards to strive for perfection and closeness with the Almighty, and to emulate Him, no matter what our shortcomings. This can only be accomplished if we have a vision; if we have goals beyond who we are now, and values that are higher than the "realistic" spiritual limits we put upon ourselves.

We need not fear our inconsistency but rather our fear of raising our sights. As my mother of blessed memory would say "There are no angels in this world". The Almighty put us in this world not in spite of our imperfections, but because of them hopefully to strive and struggle towards self-perfection.

The great Chasidic master Reb Zishe said, "In heaven I will not be held accountable for not being as kind as Abraham, or as morally strong as Isaac or as studious in Torah as Jacob, I will be told "Zishe, why weren't you Zishe!"".

Let us hold the candle of our souls high and allow it to illuminate who we really can be.